I realized that tonight, at a western themed bar full of young, attractive human trash.
That's the biggest reason I thought I was in love, because I found someone so worthy of it.
But finding someone who warrants affection does not mean anything more. I hate what an awkward pairing we are. I hate how much of an asshole I've become. I hate that I can't appreciate the things she has to offer.I hate that simple, stupid people are out there having simple, stupid love lives. May they rot in hell for all time.
Friday, October 4, 2013
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Divorce
The real question isn't "why the divorce," it's "why the marriage?"
I was stupid and in love and didn't think I could be a part of that 70% Navy divorce statistic. Me? Noooo, I'm too special and smart to be a statistic, and our love is stronger than most. Ugh.
Her situation at home was a factor, but I can't pawn it all on asshole step-dads. I'm not even sure now why I did what I did, it feels like my body was doing it's own thing for the past couple of years.
The best way I can describe it to Terin is that I felt like I was blinded by hormones, on autopilot. She thinks it's a cheap, cop-out answer; she thinks all my answers are cheap, cop-out answers. Whatever. She may be right, and soon she can be single and right.
I shouldn't have done what I did. At least I'm fixing it now before we're that crazy old couple, ready to blow up at each other at the drop of a pin. Hell, we're already acting like an old couple, and we're in our mid-twenties.
Whatever.
"Whatever" is becoming my new word of the day, everyday. It's good, though, in a volatile situation "whatever" is a bucket of water.
Whatever, man.
I was stupid and in love and didn't think I could be a part of that 70% Navy divorce statistic. Me? Noooo, I'm too special and smart to be a statistic, and our love is stronger than most. Ugh.
Her situation at home was a factor, but I can't pawn it all on asshole step-dads. I'm not even sure now why I did what I did, it feels like my body was doing it's own thing for the past couple of years.
The best way I can describe it to Terin is that I felt like I was blinded by hormones, on autopilot. She thinks it's a cheap, cop-out answer; she thinks all my answers are cheap, cop-out answers. Whatever. She may be right, and soon she can be single and right.
I shouldn't have done what I did. At least I'm fixing it now before we're that crazy old couple, ready to blow up at each other at the drop of a pin. Hell, we're already acting like an old couple, and we're in our mid-twenties.
Whatever.
"Whatever" is becoming my new word of the day, everyday. It's good, though, in a volatile situation "whatever" is a bucket of water.
Whatever, man.
Hello, again.
I missed blogging. I did it as a teenager. It feels good to really blog; "reblogging" just ain't the same. So here we go!
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